Dating a Non Christian
by:
Tracy Jones
Be ye not unequally yoked together with
unbelievers: for what fellowship hath
righteousness with unrighteousness? and what
communion hath light with darkness? -2
Corinthians 6:14
Any way you look at it, dating can be
tricky…especially when religion is involved.
Being raised in a Christian home where
tradition runs deep, you may find yourself in
the midst of a major battle when your heart is
given to someone with different beliefs. There
is, of course, nothing wrong with dating a
non-Christian, just keep in mind that you
marry who you date. If this is understood, and
you are truly willing to accept and deal with
the repercussions, all the more power to you.
All we suggest is that you consider a few
things before jumping in.
What kind of dilemmas would you face in the
future? Can a non-Christian help you
spiritually, or will they gradually pull you
down? It's easy to compromise your standards
and beliefs in order to stay appealing to that
person, but is that really being true to
yourself? It shouldn't even be an option to
alter everything you've based your life around
because your beliefs have helped shape you
into the person you are, the person that they
fell for.
Then there's always the issue of children.
What kind of foundation will their lives be
built on? Would they be encouraged to attend
church and live the principles that you live
by, or will they be brought up in the middle
of a constant tug-of-war? It general, it just
seems to be easier on everyone, especially
kids, when both parties follow the same
rulebook. Then again, there are those
occasional exceptions to the rule.
We've all heard different stories of
Christians dating non-Christians who
eventually do turn their lives to God. They
later marry and have strong, happy
relationships with values centered on Christ.
Or, there are those couples that just don't
let religion get in the way. Both are willing
to compromise and let the other partner have
their freedom to worship and live in a way
that suits them. As promising as it sounds,
though, it's not always realistic. Many
couples involved in "dual-faith" relationships
will find themselves buried in conflict and
heartache at some point, causing them to break
up or divorce.
It's to be expected that meeting new
people, especially people that you're
compatible with, is going to be challenging.
But, consider carefully whether short-term
gain is worth ending up with the wrong person.
Falling in love is easy, but it's hard to
imagine ever voluntarily walking away from the
relationship because your partner's beliefs
contradict your own.
The bottom line is that it's up to you who
you date, because you're the navigator of your
future. No matter who you end up with, you're
bound to run into problems now and then. That
just comes with the territory. From there,
it's up to you what happens. You'll either
choose to stick at it and work through the
rough patches, or you'll decide it's too hard
and back out. If it makes your decision any
easier, just remember this advice: when a
Christian and a non-Christian jump into a
relationship, the scales are uneven and likely
to tip!
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About The Author
Tracy Jones was raised in a large and loving Christian family. As the
president of her church’s youth program,
Tracy was always very active in local and
international ministries. Throughout
school, she was a faithful member and
treasurer of the local chapter of the
Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Tracy
graduated from Florida State University in
1987 and has earned 18 years of business
experience. Since 1997 she has spent her
career building business in the technology
industry with Yahoo!, Inc. and was
recently recruited by Spark Networks to
build the online Christian community
through the ChristianMingle personals
service.
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